Adrenaline
by AllOverTheWorld
Summary: FORMERLY: How the Times Move Us! A collection of Mike/Fi oneshots that try and portray their most vaunerable moments or the times when they realize they need each other. New Chapter Up! Please Read and Review!
1. The Rising Sun

Fiona hung up the phone and before she even turned around I could tell that there was something wrong I'm not sure if it was by the way her shoulders shrank or the way her head dropped but I knew there was a problem. She turned and looked at me with the face that only ever meant she was trying very hard to hold back tears. I took a step forward but she took a step back putting her arms out to stop me from coming any closer. "Fi what-"I began to saw setting down my cup of blueberry yoghurt on the counter next to her empty yoghurt container.

"Sean-Sean-Sean was shot to death in his apartment." She spilled out as if unable to control it and without making eye contact with me she turned and began to run towards the door but I was faster and grabbed her arm gently pulling her to me, hugging her close.

Shockingly she didn't resist, she just crumpled into me wrapping her own arms around me holding me like I was the last thing she had on earth. I didn't know what to do of course my brain was whirring with possible actions I could take but how do I know what was right and what was wrong in this scenario. I had never seen Fi so-so-vulnerable. I never thought I would hear Fi's name and that word in the same sentence ever in my life. So we simply stood there her hugging me tightly and my head resting on top of hers as she tried to keep control of the emotions that were coursing through her body. It was like she needed the reassurance that I was still here, my mind flashed back to when I thought she had died in the house fire.

The way I had held her to me and my shock and realization that my life was not over. It was strange really that I never knew how much I needed her until I had almost lost her. Things tended to be that way for me I was beginning to notice this more and more. Eventually I pulled myself away from her and she avoided looking at me, the usually _I'm too strong to cry in front of you _persona enveloped Fi and I knew I had to stop her form leaving. "Fi." I said grabbing her hand softly and as our eyes met she nodded as if understanding how I felt. She knew that I didn't want her to cry alone and that I wanted her to know I was here for her and I always would be.

Gently I led her over to the bed and she sat down while I quickly finished the rest of my yoghurt and dumped it in the garbage before coming back and sitting next to her. We sat in silence her head resting against my shoulder the tears spilling silently from her while I pretended not to notice. Finally the shaking stopped and she fell asleep like that, her head resting against my shoulders. Slowly, so I didn't wake her, I lifted her into my arms and set her down in a more comfortable position in the bed wrapping the comforter around her shoulders.

Leaving her sleeping in the bed I walked over to the balcony and opened the doors so I could stand out in the midnight air and let my own emotions flow freely through my body and let the unfairness of it all be taken out on the world. To me the worst part was knowing that Fiona could never go back to Ireland, she would not get to see her own brothers funeral. I shook my head at the thought and decided to talk to Sam as soon as it was a reasonable hour again. "Michael." I heard from inside the loft so I turned and walked back inside closing the door behind me.

I looked to see if Fiona was awake but she was still asleep her hand grappling blindly at where I usually lay. I quickly changed into some boxers and lay next to her letting her body adjust to my presence as soon as I lay in bed she seemed more relaxed; her body fitting in with the shape of mine; her hand grabbing my own and pulling it across her chest. I tried my best to fall asleep but I knew the next morning would be full of more emotions worse than this late night disaster. With that one my mind I finally drifted into a dark abyss just as the sun began it's wretched ascent into the morning sky.

_**So I wrote this in half an hour, I'm not sure how well written it is but it was some inspirations that I just needed to let out. I might add more Mike/Fi oneshots here or I might not. **_

_**PLEASE READ AND REVIEW **_

_AllOverTheWorld _


	2. How Do You Love Him?

I stormed out of the loft and down the stairs before pausing momentarily to put my sunglasses on and pull out the keys to my car. As my fingers dug in my purse they hit the barrel of the gun I kept stashed there and for a fleeting instant I pictured my self turning and shooting Michael, not bad enough to kill him just to get him to not follow me. I shook my head and pulled out my sunglasses before walking over to my car and getting in. It was baking inside the black seat burned my skin as I sat down in just as I backed out I saw Michael's leap down the last few stairs and shout my name "Fi!" but I ignored him and turned away feeling the pain inside my heart as I did so.

As I drove around the city I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as I tried to contain them but to no avail. Each time I blinked a few more tears would roll down my face and I would sigh, wipe them away and think about why I was so _angry _with Michael. I drove around for about twenty minutes, just long enough to loose Michael if he was tailing me, and then decided to head home. As I drove I soon realized I wasn't going to my house but the Michael's mothers, I tended to do this when I was frustrated or worried about him. Sometimes I would just drive past and see Maddie smoking in the living room and other times I would go in and we would talk about everything except Michael. As I approached the front door I hesitated wondering if I should have come, what if Sam was there, he would tell Michael and I would have no time to escape. Resolutely I decided to ring the doorbell and ask Maddie the one question I always had the most trouble asking.

She answered the door only a few seconds after I rung it which meant she knew I was coming and that also meant that Michael knew I would come here. As the door swung open I put on a pleasant face and smiled as Maddie welcomed my into the house. "Fiona! I wasn't expecting you or Michael until tomorrow." She said it like a statement but I knew there was a question hidden beneath the pleasantries.

"I'm sorry, if this is a bad time-" I said quickly hoping that I could get out of this situation

'Oh no I'm not busy in fact the ladies have just left after our poker game. Would you like something to drink?" She asked peering at me

I shook my head and took a seat at the dining table and waited as Maddie lit another cigarette and grabbed a can of Coke from the fridge "How was poker?" I asked

Maddie looked at me in that _I know you are here for another reason that to ask about my poker game _look and said "What happened this time Fiona? I may not be a spy or anything but I know that there are things you would rather be doing on a Friday afternoon than sitting in my house."

"How do you love him?" I asked spitting the words out before my confidence failed me that was the one thing I wanted to know the most. No matter what stunt Michael pulled she would always love him and not just because she is obligated to either but really love him.

Maddie burst out into laughter "I don't know" she said "I really have no idea, sometimes I feel like telling him he can not keep another client here but I understand how much he needs me. The worrying about weather he's going to call me tomorrow or in the next ten years nearly kills me and the never knowing if he's going to be alive for Christmas keeps me up at night. It's just something that I do, I know that no matter what crazy stunt he pulls he will do his best to keep me safe and while it doesn't seem like he is listening to a damn word I say I know he is."

She looked into my eyes "I know it doesn't seem like he is listening to what you are telling him but honestly he is. Every time you tell him he is working to hard and it seems like he is shrugging it off those wheels begin turning and he is planning how he can show you he's not. Without you, Fiona, he would not be the person he is today. I don't know much about what happened in Ireland but I do know that when he left you there it killed him inside and he does everything he can so he doesn't have to do it again." She finished, took a sip of her Coke and put her hand on mine looking at me with an intense expression on her face "You know he called me today about ten minutes before you arrived. He said that you guys had argued and that he was worried you might leave Miami-"

"So I came here-" he said and stepped out from the hallway that led to his old bedroom

I spluttered "You-you- you heard everything?!" and had to restrain my self from attacking him "You're not supposed to hear that!" I was so angry with him all over again that I didn't notice Maddie had slipped out of the room.

He stepped towards me arms open in surrender but I back away not wanting him to be near my right now. He had heard **everything **I had told Maddie and….the anger radiated from me and Michael seemed to know this because he backed off. I looked him dead in the face "You never listen to me or at least it doesn't seem like it. You always shrug it off like dying is no big deal to you" I paused and took a breath "Maybe dying isn't a big deal to you Michal but I-I-I" I stopped my tirade not sure of how to continue

He took a step forward "Fi I do listen to you, every word you say."

I couldn't help but laugh a cold unbelieving laugh "Really?"

"Yes," his voice remained calm and he took another step towards me

"Michael" I started wrapping my arms around his neck "You can't die." I was expressing a part of me I had never let him see before. It was the part of me that knew if he died I would go back to Ireland and get my self killed, the part of me that knew without him I was not who I am. I needed him. With that thought on my mind and the heat of his body radiating onto me I kissed him.

Ten minutes later we were back at his house his keys fumbling in the lock as he tired to open it so we would get out of the pouring rain. As he closed the door behind him we looked at each other and he knew I had forgiven him. He walked closer to me wrapping his arms around my waist and I rest my head on his chest. As we walked backwards towards the bed he murmured in my ear "Thank-you."

**So I'm not sure what I think of it 'cause the ending gave me some problems but I suppose I'm okay with it. I am now accepting request for a oneshot or character pairings you would like to see. I enjoy writing Michael and Fiona oneshots and would like something less lovey dovey and more action I suppose. Any ideas are welcome as long as they are accompanied by a review **

_**AllOverTheWorld**_


	3. Almost Gone

As the bullet speeds towards me I know this is the end of my life. It's strange how long it seems a bullet can take to travel ten feet when you're on the receiving end. When I thought about how I would die I always figured it would be like this and yet not like this. I always imagined that I would be fighting five guys off with three at my feet already and a bomb about to go off, dramatic I know. But here, with one person standing across from me and a bomb nowhere in sight I think I'd rather not die like this.

My life isn't flashing before my eyes, at least not in the typical movie way where it's all your proudest moments on display. Instead I'm cursed with my last thoughts to be about my regrets, every move I have made that I regret, every action or word spoken that hurt someone I cared about. Strangely and not so surprisingly most of them involve Fiona. I could never get it right when it came to her; every action I took was a step backwards mostly because I was blinded by my own ambitions to realize that I had everything I needed in front of me.

I feel the bullet hit me about three centimeters above the spot where my heart is, I feel the ribs crack and break as the bullet enters my body. I'm sent backwards by the force of it, stumbling backwards into the wall. My head cracks against it and I know that if I live to see tomorrow I'm going to have one hell of a headache. I slump to the ground the gun clattering against the concrete floor and the blood already dripping onto the floor.

As I lie there I wonder if Miami Dade police will investigate my death but considering I have no past they probably won't. The realization that my death will go unsolved in the records nearly gives me the strength to get up except this isn't a movie and I'm only human. I hear more gun fire and I wait for the bullets to hit me and for my existence to finally fade away but instead I hear the clatter of guns hitting the concrete and someone running towards me. "Michael!" Fi's voice calls out and I know that she is right next to me because I feel her hand holding mine and I feel her frantic breath on my face as she tries to help me breath but it seems like she is a million miles away.

I'm slipping away faster than I can catch myself. The blackness is so inviting, so comfy that it seems like a waste not to slip into and let the pain drift away. I let go of myself and let it suck me backwards and the last things I hear as I slip away are her cries for me to stay with her. I wish I could tell her I'm always with her, even when we fight; my thoughts are always about her.

___

I hear the single gun shot and know instantly that it isn't Michael's Sig and that he must be in trouble. I look at Sam who seems to have realized the same thing as me because he is grabbing his gun and opening the car door. I follow him and within five seconds he is kicking the door down. We both start firing at the same time and the man who was holding the gun collapses to the ground. Sam goes in and checks the perimeter and I scan the area looking for Michael.

My heart stopped when I saw Michael's body on the ground, the blood already seeping from a wound three or so centimeters above where his heart was "Michael!" I called out and before I could stop my self I was running over to him.

Our eyes met and I could see him slipping away from me faster than I was breathing, I bent over him and tried to give him CPR but I saw no use. I was kidding myself, a shot that close, _No. He's not going to die_ I told my self and I whispered over and over again "Don't leave me Michael. I need you. Don't Leave me." I repeated but he slipped away from me.

Sam came rushing over and with an uncharacteristically swift movement he had his shirt off and was already dealing with Michael's wound. I sat there watching as Sam did his best to stop Michael's wound and as I did I realized that this side of Sam never appeared in front of Michael and me. This side of him was the Navy Seal side, the side that he had left behind years ago. It was fascinating to watch and as I did it took me away from the almost certain fact that Michael was dead. "I've got a pulse." He said in utter amazement

My spirits lifted at those three words and I seemed to float back to reality as sirens were blaring faintly in the distance. I looked at Sam and on the unspoken count we lifted Michael and carried him out to the car and set him in the back seat of the Charger. As I sat down in the passenger seat I was surprised when Sam grabbed my hand "He's going to be okay Fi. I'm going to take him to my doctor friend and see what he can do, off the books."

___

There was a hint of cigarette smoke in the air and a there was something else that I managed to figure out that it was the perfume I had bought Fi last month. Either heaven was a very cruel place or I was still alive. I opened my eyes and saw that I was in my old room, I could tell by the paint on the walls and the way the blanket still smelt like the time I tried to get ride of it by setting it on fire.

I turned my head and saw Fiona sitting in a chair from the dining room sitting next to me fast asleep. I tried to sit up but my torso was on fire and even that small movement killed my. I groaned and closed my eyes waiting for the waves of nausea and pain to leave. I turned my head again slowly and saw Fiona still fast asleep seeing this I began to wonder what day it was and how exhausted she must be.

Suddenly her eyes shot open and she grabbed the gun that was sitting in her lap before realizing that I was awake. Relief consumed her body and she smiled "Michael." She sighed

I smiled slowly and let the relief that I was alive wash over me "How-" I started but a wave of pain coursed through me and I closed my eyes hoped it would pass quickly. I hated when people saw that I was in pain especially Fiona it made me feel so helpless. "did I-" Io sputtered out before succumbing to the pain in my midsection.

"Sam was brilliant." She said and I was shocked that she was outright commending Sam for anything "So was his doctor friend said that you would feel like shit for a while." She gulped turning away and I could see how much this whole incident hurt her "You almost died." She said quickly before turning away so I wouldn't see how much this statement affected her.

I reached out and grabbed her hand softly "I didn't Fi." Trying to reassure her that I was still alive but hardly believing it myself "I didn't" I said repeating over and over again holding her hand tighter ever time I repeated it.

She stood up and lay down next to me letting her fingers intertwine with mine "Don't ever go in alone again." She said fighting back tears.

The fact that Michael had almost died nearly brought tears to my eyes but I was determined to just be happy that he was alive. As we lay in bed our fingers intertwined I lay my head on his good shoulder "Don't ever go in alone again." I whispered

In a way I blamed myself for those whole incident, I was angry at him and there fore I told him he could do this alone. Of course Sam had dragged me along with him and…….

I almost broke down right there but I knew that Michael would just tell me it wasn't my fault and---Michael raised his good hand to my face and wiped the stray tear away from my face "It's not your fault." He whispered as if he could read my mind

I shook my head "I should have been there."

"Then they would have shot you instead and then I would be without you." He said as he somehow managed to wipe the tears that were rolling down my face and brush my hair out of the way at the same time. We fell asleep like that and I never wanted to wake up.

**So there you go everyone. I'm not sure how happy I am with the ending but w/e it is over and I like it. Comment and Review please **


	4. Almost Gone Revised

As the bullet speeds towards me I know this is the end of my life. It's strange how long it seems a bullet can take to travel ten feet when you're on the receiving end. When I thought about how I would die I always figured it would be like this and yet not like this. I always imagined that I would be fighting five guys off with three at my feet already and a bomb about to go off, dramatic I know. But here, with one person standing across from me and a bomb nowhere in sight I think I'd rather not die like this.

My life isn't flashing before my eyes, at least not in the typical movie way where it's all your proudest moments on display. Instead I'm cursed with my last thoughts to be about my regrets, every move I have made that I regret, every action or word spoken that hurt someone I cared about. Strangely and not so surprisingly most of them involve Fiona. I could never get it right when it came to her; every action I took was a step backwards mostly because I was blinded by my own ambitions to realize that I had everything I needed in front of me.

I feel the bullet hit me about three centimeters above the spot where my heart is, I feel the ribs crack and break as the bullet enters my body. I'm sent backwards by the force of it, stumbling backwards into the wall. My head cracks against it and I know that if I live to see tomorrow I'm going to have one hell of a headache. I slump to the ground the gun clattering against the concrete floor and the blood already dripping onto the floor.

As I lie there I wonder if Miami Dade police will investigate my death but considering I have no past they probably won't. The realization that my death will go unsolved in the records nearly gives me the strength to get up except this isn't a movie and I'm only human. I hear more gun fire and I wait for the bullets to hit me and for my existence to finally fade away but instead I hear the clatter of guns hitting the concrete and someone running towards me. "Michael!" Fi's voice calls out and I know that she is right next to me because I feel her hand holding mine and I feel her frantic breath on my face as she tries to help me breath but it seems like she is a million miles away.

I'm slipping away faster than I can catch myself. The blackness is so inviting, so comfy that it seems like a waste not to slip into and let the pain drift away. I let go of myself and let it suck me backwards and the last things I hear as I slip away are her cries for me to stay with her. I wish I could tell her I'm always with her, even when we fight; my thoughts are always about her.

___

I hear the single gun shot and know instantly that it isn't Michael's Sig and that he must be in trouble. I look at Sam who seems to have realized the same thing as me because he is grabbing his gun and opening the car door. I follow him and within five seconds he is kicking the door down. We both start firing at the same time and the man who was holding the gun collapses to the ground. Sam goes in and checks the perimeter and I scan the area looking for Michael.

My heart stopped when I saw Michael's body on the ground, the blood already seeping from a wound three or so centimeters above where his heart was "Michael!" I called out and before I could stop my self I was running over to him.

Our eyes met and I could see him slipping away from me faster than I was breathing, I bent over him and tried to give him CPR but I saw no use. I was kidding myself, a shot that close, _No. He's not going to die_ I told my self and I whispered over and over again "Don't leave me Michael. I need you. Don't Leave me." I repeated but he slipped away from me.

Sam came rushing over and with an uncharacteristically swift movement he had his shirt off and was already dealing with Michael's wound. I sat there watching as Sam did his best to stop Michael's wound and as I did I realized that this side of Sam never appeared in front of Michael and me. This side of him was the Navy Seal side, the side that he had left behind years ago. It was fascinating to watch and as I did it took me away from the almost certain fact that Michael was dead. "I've got a pulse." He said in utter amazement

My spirits lifted at those three words and I seemed to float back to reality as sirens were blaring faintly in the distance. I looked at Sam and on the unspoken count we lifted Michael and carried him out to the car and set him in the back seat of the Charger. As I sat down in the passenger seat I was surprised when Sam grabbed my hand "He's going to be okay Fi. I'm going to take him to my doctor friend and see what he can do, off the books."

___

I'm sure I'm dead mainly because it is illogical for me not to be dead considering the bullet hit me just centimeters from my heart. Somehow though, I don't think I am because I doubt heaven would smell like a mixture of cigarettes and that perfume I got Fi ages and ages ago. My head is pounding and my chest feels like it's on fire but pain means I'm alive and I'm very happy to be alive. I don't want to open my eyes because I'm afraid that if I do it will confirm I'm dead and all my hopes will have been a cruel trick of fate.

Mustering all the courage and wounded and probable dead ex-spy can I opened my eyes and was relieved to see I was in my old bed room. I instantly recognized the wallpaper and spot on the ceiling where I threw a wrench at my father but missed badly. All around me are signs that I am still alive and not wishing I was. I close my eyes and blink just to be sure but when I open them I am still lying in my old room. I try and turn my head but the smallest movements, I'm soon to realize, send waves of nausea and pain coursing through my body. I close my eyes and wait for it to pass and as my eyes are closed I feel my self getting dragged back into that state of unconsciousness, I fight a loosing battle and I am soon back under its spell.

---

I silently accepted the cup of tea Maddie handed me and tore my eyes away from Michael's sleeping form just long enough to mutter a word of thanks. The cup was warm as I held it in my hands and even as I took a sip it could do nothing to relieve the feeling that Michael was going to die. He had only woken up once and that was just long enough to try and turn his head and realize that it was agony. Even as he slept the pain was clear on his face in such a way that he would never let show if he was conscious.

I've been sitting here for two days alternating with his mother who would sit on the chair and I would go to Nate's old room and try to sleep. Every time I close my eyes I see his lifeless body surrounded by blood and the bullet just visible in between to broken ribs. If I had to guess I probably got between five and eight hours of sleep in the past two days but Sam had been getting even less. He was up half the night drinking bottles of beer and the other half was spent reassuring Maddie that Michael was going to survive. It has always shocked how much beer Sam can drink and still remain as sober as a stone, he drinks at least two bottles an hour and that may not seem crazy, in fact slow for Sam, but when he's sitting there just staring out the window it is very unnerving.

The door creaks open and Sam walks in his hair is messy and there are bags under his eyes that show how little sleep he has had and how much beer he's been drinking "How is he?" He asks as if the sight of Michael's still unconscious body is somehow different than the last time he asked

"You think that there is some change Sam." I reply a little bit too sharply "you think that I want the constant reminder that there has been no change since we brought him here?"

"You're not the only one who cares about him Fiona!" he retorts and the words sting like salt poured on an open wound. He see's my expression and softens "Hey." He says and walks over to me "He's going to be alright." He says as he puts his hand on my shoulder

I turn my head and look at him "Do you really believe that or are you saying that to make me feel better. I'm not six Sam I can tell when people are lying to me."

He sighed slowly "Fi" his tone was soft and gentle "I know of other people who have survived worse than this, your brother is one of them."

I nodded half accepting this explanation but still "Why is he still unconscious?' I asked and I was beginning to feel like the six year old I had told Sam I wasn't

"Michael has taken a lot of beatings lately his body is just taking the time it needs to recuperate." Sam turned and walked out of the room leaving me and my worries alone with my cold cup of tea.

---

When I wake up the second time there is no light shining in from the window or any light that I can see coming from inside the room. My head is throbbing less than it was and I can turn my head slightly too both sides and gain more bearings on my room. To my right is the wall and while I'm sure I would learn a lot by staring at it the figure to my left is a much more welcome sight. To my left Fiona is sitting in a chair from my dining room table on foot resting on the seat and her head resting on that knee. I groan slightly as a wave of pain encompasses my torso just as I mange to silence my groan Fi's head shoots straight up and I see her hand reach instinctively for the gun that lay in her lap. "Fi." I say before breaking out into a coughing fit, my throat feels like sandpaper as I try to speak.

---

I am finally able to fall asleep and I am resting in an uneasy dream land when I hear a groan coming from the bed. Instantly I grab my gun and begin to raise it before I realize that Michael has woken up, he is trying to speak and "Fi." He tries to speak my name before breaking out into a fit of coughing

I reach out and grab the cup of water that has been sitting on the bedside table just for this occasion and help him drink some of it. He tries to gulp it down but I'm afraid he might choke so I pull the cup away "Little sips." I said and I see the hint of a smile play across his otherwise pain stricken face.

After about ten tiny sips he seems satisfied and tries to talk again "Fi-" he pauses while he starts coughing again so I put a finger to his lips and smile at him. He knows I won't leave his side and anyway now that he is alive I might be able to get some sleep. As I sit back down I watch as he closes his eyes and with a small smile still playing on his lips he falls asleep. I can tell he's sleep and not a weird come because he is still smiling and not grimacing in pain or moaning.

Satisfied I shift myself from the chair to the other side of the bed which is completely empty. For some strange reason I feel like he did that on purpose, leave that side of the bed open for me. I know I should go to Nate's room but it seems like Michael is pulling towards that spot next to him. I sigh, and slip of my shoes and walk over to the other side of the bed. I just lay on top of the blankets not wanting to disturb Michael. As I lay there I think about how close I can to loosing him and how I could never have survived that, although I would probably never admit it to him, I needed him more than anything. We seemed to fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. His calm and always logical actions balanced by erratic and most of the time hasty ones. I was just about to drift off when someone's hand grab's mine. I open my eyes and look over just in time to see Michael's eyes close in a satisfied kind of way. I fell asleep like that, my head resting on his good shoulder our fingers intertwined in a permanent kind of way.

**Okay, so I revised the story and added a lot. I wasn't completely happy with the previous ending but I am happy with this one. Hope you didn't get to confused with the changes of perspective I just think that if you write in the first person you get more of a sense of what is going on inside the characters head. I have decided to make this chapter four instead of replacing chapter three because...well I don't actually know but I hope that you enjoy it. Also if you like tell me which one you like better.**

**AllOverTheWorld **


	5. Stormy Night

It was the worst weather Miami had seen in twenty five years and that was saying something considering the number of storms that passed through yearly. A few days before the rain started there had been a monster hurricane not sixty miles off of the coast of Florida and it was those after affects they were feeling. There was no running water, no electricity and no way to leave the city unless you wanted to swim; anyone that was there was trapped. The waves that crashed onto the shore were anywhere from five to fifty feet high. The National Guard was trying to send people in but the eighty mile an hour winds blew most helicopters off course or there was no suitable/ safe landing spot. It was a disaster.

* * *

_When you're a spy you are trained to go days with little food, you're trained to take extreme heat and you sure get used to begin cold a lot. What they don't train you for is boredom, they don't tell you how to resist the urges to try and swim your way to Mississippi. Boredom is a spy's nightmare. _

I looked around at the loft wondering how much more I could take of the constant pounding of rain on a tin roof or having to wake up every few hours to change over the buckets that were currently stopping my loft from flooding. So far I had worked on my Polish from a fairly worn polish text book, cleaned all of my guns at least twice and I was on my umpteenth game of solitaire. Throwing down the cards in disgust I walked over to the radio I had been working on converting to a camera and microphone for when I leave and I get unwanted guests. I was almost done but with out a few micro screws and copper wire I was as close to being done as I was to learning about my burn notice.

I flipped open my cell phone and was about to dial my mother's number when I remembered the lack of cell phone service was doing a great job of not letting me knew whether or not my mom was alright. I set it down on the bed next to the jumble of cards that was used for solitaire only moments ago. I was jealous of Sam who was probably sitting at some poolside getting his tan on in Las Vegas while I was surviving on bread and blueberry yogurt. I glanced at the garbage can where I had tossed the three cups of yogurt I had eaten in the past two days and watched as the drip of water that had steadily been falling into it grew to a drizzle. Sighing I stood up and searched for another bucket to put there and my heart sank as I realized that I was out of buckets.

As I stood there in minor despair wondering when on earth this was going to stop I realized that I had been in much worse. Afghanistan was a prime example of this: I had to travel three days through the desert with a packet of crackers and three canteens of water with some rebels closing in on me. That had sucked just like this sucked now. Another example was Russia: I was stuck in a cave for thirty six hours with no heat in the middle of the winter while the people on the other side decided to kill me or not. Compared to those this was heaven but still stuck with very little food, no electricity and no one to talk to was driving me crazy.

I was so wrapped up in all these thoughts that I didn't hear the putting of a motor outside my loft, as this new sound finally connected inside my brain I grabbed my gun and walked to the window. I looked out and saw to my shock Fiona making her way up the stairs but the torrent of water falling down the stairs with the wind was making in hard. I scanned the loft quickly and grabbed my last dry sheet before heading over to the door. I opened it and stepped out into the monsoon of water pouring from the sky, I saw Fi's eyes flit up before resuming the struggle to climb the stairs. Instantly I tossed her the sheet and she grabbed hold using it to haul herself up the stairs. We tumbled backwards into the loft together with me landing on my back and her on top of me. "Hey." She said before rolling off of me and taking off her soaking shirt "Do you have _anything_ dry in this place?" she asked as I pulled myself to my feet and grabbed her soaking shirt from her. I couldn't help but admire how sexy she looked soaking wet, her hair plastered to her face and back.

"Not really" I said trying to pull my eyes away from her and make an attempt to scan the loft "Everything is damp."

She sighed and climbed up the ladder to the 'second floor' of my loft and started looking through the piles of stuff I had stuck up there to prevent water damage. I heard a triumphant shout and waited as she changed out of her stuff and into a pair of old sweatpants and a gray t-shirt I had lying around. As she climbed back down the stairs I finally asked "How did you get here?"

"The floor above me caved in, or at least the living room did. They told me that it was no longer safe for me to be there and I had to make other accommodations. Lucky for me a kind man offered to take me to where I needed to go."

She walked over and sat down on the bed wrapping herself in the covers trying to get warm. With her being there all the boredom that seemed so ominous minutes ago was gone. I walked over to the bed and sat behind her wrapping my arms around her and letting her lie back onto my body. Her head rested on my chest and I knew she was listening to my heartbeat. It was something she used to do back in Ireland. We would just lay there in silence and she would listen to my heartbeat and I would sleep, until her older brother Craig would come back from the pub in which they would fight and I would feel awkward. "You're thinking about Ireland." She said quietly

I shifted slightly to get more comfortable "How did you know?"

She laughed a little "Your heartbeat sped up."

I smiled "Craig never liked me did he?" I asked suddenly and I felt her tense up slightly as I mentioned her eldest brothers' name.

She rolled over and placed her chin on my chest so she was looking me straight in the eyes "It's not that he didn't like you it's just that he didn't trust you. He never trusted anyone after Claire-" she cut herself short of saying _died_ "He thought you would break my heart and he would never see me again."

There was an uncomfortable silence that neither of us seemed willing to break, finally though I spoke "I loved you, you know that right."

She did respond instead she just rolled back over to I couldn't see her face, her head resting on my chest.

"Fi-" I said almost begging, every time we talked about this she either attacked my or went silent "I didn't want to, you-"

She cut me off "You didn't want to leave me but you did anyway. Not so much as a note?!' she said her voice rising and her Irish accent becoming more prominent in her voice.

"I'm sorry." I said softly, I was not going to tell her why because it would only lead to fighting and in these cramped quarters that was not the best idea.

She remained still and silent for five minutes before rolling over and looking at me her hands tracing a pattern on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her holding her still chilly frame to me and she smiled moving closer up my body so her head was now nestled in the crook of my neck. Eventually our breathing slowed to a steady rhythm and after a while we fell asleep like that.

___________

When I woke up I realized something was different, I'm not sure if it was the fact that Michael was not in the bed or the fact the raining had lessened. I sat up clutching the blanket to my now naked body and looked around the loft; it was a mess there were buckets of water everywhere along with an old polish textbook and a handful of notes to go along with it. I saw Michael standing at the door evidently talking to somebody. Based on his posture and the lack of a gun in the back of his pants it was no one threatening. I lay back down and waited for a few minutes before Michael turned, closing the door behind him. "Who was that?" I asked

"Coast Guard, they were making sure everything is okay." He said as he carried a box of supplies given to him by the coast guard and set them on the bar.

I got out of bed and walked over to him wrapping my arms around his neck "what did you tell them?" I asked softly

He smiled and responded my kissing my lips, at first it was softly but after I returned the kiss it became more passionate. I walked backwards to the bed and fell onto it and…….

**Well, I think you know what happens there ;) **

**I'm not sure what the inspiration behind this was, but hey just a little bit of Mike/Fi for you. Please Review! Any suggestions are welcome! **

_**AllOverTheWorld**_

**P.S. I'm not sure how accurate I am with the conditions and such so just bear with me and know that it was bad.**


	6. Necessary

**Disclaimer: I do not own Burn Notice **

**(Why do we need to say that I mean it's obvious I don't…right?)**

**So after a brief hiatus due to school and track I'm back with hopefully a story you will all enjoy. This is outside my usual first person point of view but I hope you like it.**

**This is taking a fanfic about if O'Neil had never come and if Fi had actually left to go to Ireland. I might add a second chapter from Fi's point of view if I get enough response or if I feel like it. **

___________

Michael sat on his bed fingering the gun he held in his hands over and over again. This was so much more than just a gun to him, to him it was her. It was what he kept on him at all times, like a picture in a wallet that reminded him of her at all times. Now it was the only thing he had left to remind him of the times they had shared, the times they had spent together on surveillance and the times they had made love. He remembered claiming to have not seen it the day that she left to go home:

"_Are you sure Michael? I mean a gun just doesn't go missing." She said _

"_You probably packed it away without realizing it. It's probably waiting for you at home." He said only half paying attention to what she had said _

"_Are you okay?" she asked knowing full well that he wasn't _

"_Yea Fi I'm fine." _

"_You don't seem fine." She said _

He stopped the memories from coming; every one was a bullet ripping through his heart and made him die a little more. He set the gun down and walked over to the fridge which was unusually full of yoghurts. He grabbed one and opened it looking at the contents within and set it down again, since she had left he had not been the same. Miami no longer seems appealing, yoghurt was making him puke his guts up and everyone seemed to remind him of her. Sam had not come by in a while, he had given up at trying to make Michael see that there was nothing he could do to change the situation and had just left him alone. Even his mother had stopped calling him and had resided to talking to Sam who was told her that it was his way of coping.

Only Strikler had continued as if nothing was wrong, not noticing that Michael seemed to be in a comatose state. He continued telling Michael that all was on its way to being fixed he only had to do this, only had to do that. As Michael stood there, fridge wide open and cup of yoghurt about to fall, he wondered how much he wanted to be back 'in'.

When he was in Afghanistan he could pretend that she had wanted him gone, no matter how wrong it was. He could do things to keep his mind off of her such as avoid getting blown up but here in Miami he was trying not to kill Strikler. Here he was filled with every mistake he ever made, here he was forced to live with the fact he had pushed her away with his obsession to have his old life back.

She had left a little over a week ago and since he had watched her flight take off he had barely slept, barely eaten basically he was barely functioning. It was the third time that day he had stared at the gun wondering if he should have given it to her, if he should just move on and be happy he was so close to getting his old life back but every time he knew he was wrong.

He had changed since he had arrived in Miami two and a half years ago. He had broken the most important rule a spy should never break...don't get emotionally connected. When he thought about he knew he had broken that rule a long time ago. He had broken that rule in Ireland when they had made love for the first time; he had broken that rule every second of his life in Afghanistan that he had regretted leaving her.

He shook his head out of the daze trying to stop thinking about her, the way she could handle herself and need him at the same time. They way they balanced each other in a weird way. She was loud and impulsive while he was logical (most of the time) and could blend in with a crowd. It was the way they contradicted each other, the way they could have a conversation without words and so much more that made Michael realize that with out her he was not himself, not any more. He was able to be an empty version of himself in Afghanistan but now after being around her for two and a half years he needed her like he needed air.

He pushed the door to the fridge closed and threw the full cup of yoghurt away in the trash letting the resounding thud it made ring in his ears. He picked the gun up and looked at it again remembering the times she had saved his life with it. He was so wrapped up in the memories that he didn't hear the crunch of tires on gravel nor he did he hear the feet walking up the steps to his loft.

He was shaken out of his daze by the sound of his door being open and instinctively he pointed the gun at the door. His mind stopped functioning, he couldn't think straight. This had to be a joke, some sick joke played by Stickler to toy with his emotions. "Fi?" he said quietly, disbelieving

She looked at him, looked at the gun in his hand, she looked around at the uncharacteristically messy loft and walked towards him. She removed the gun from his hands and looked into his eyes as if seeing him for the first time. She wrapped her arms around him holding him in a very un- Fi like way. Slowly his mind seemed to catch up with what was going on and he wrapped his arms around her holding as if he would never let her go. She started to kiss him passionately and he returned the passion. They moved slowly from the bar to the bed and she made to take off his pants but he stopped her. "Why?" he asked "Why did you come back?"

She froze, as if she had been hoping to not ever have to answer that question "I'm not the same person I used to be. Who I am now has everything to do with what I've done here, everything to do with you. I didn't fit in there, not even with my family. I talk differently, I walk differently, hell I'm not as impulsive as I used to be. I was about to make a bomb for Sean and suddenly I thought "_Is this what Michael would do?"_ I didn't make the bomb in fact I told Sean a different way to solve the problem. He just stared at me as if I had gone mental. I've changed Michael." He nodded as if accepting this answer "Sam called me you know." She said "He told me that he was scared you were going to do something dangerous. He told me that you were not eating, not talking and probably not sleeping. Your mother is worried sick about you and Nate as well."

Michael nodded "I-I-" he tried to make words come out "I-"

Fi grinned and kissed him "We're no good at this."

He smiled for the first time in nine days and began to kiss her lips, her neck, everywhere savoring the fact that she was home to stay. Before they fell asleep much, much later that evening Fi looked at Michael and asked "Do you think Sam will be happy or sad that I'm back?"

Michael let out a laugh "I think he'll be happy I haven't gone and done something dangerous. Anyway even if he isn't I'm glad your back." And kissed her neck softly "I never knew how much I needed you." He whispered as they fell asleep.

Fi just smiled refusing to say out loud that she needed him as much as he needed her.

________

**So, there you go ladies and gentlemen, another story of Fi and Michael's endless rollercoaster relationship. As always Reviews are welcomed **

_AllOverTheWorld _


	7. The Dark Side of the Moon

**Disclaimer: I do not own Burn Notice (hence FANfiction) **

_**Dark Side of the Moon **_

**AllOverTheWorld**

The sun dipped below the horizon sending Michael Westin in to shadows inside the hut he had discovered a few hours before. It did little to protect him from the elements that raged outside but it put a roof over his head and allowed Michael to sustain a small fire that provided enough heat to keep him alive. He sat there staring at the flames watching as they danced around each other and every time he closed his eyes he saw her, he saw them. Every time he closed his eyes he sees her in front of him and guilt would rush into his brain like an adrenaline rush. His breathing would speed up and his pulse would race and it took every ounce of control he had to not scream out.

He had broken the single most important rule a spy could break and now he was paying for it. When he was in training there was a reason why they never knew each other's real names. If they knew each others real names they would get connected, become attached, make a real connection. He had never meant to make a connection, never meant for it change his life forever but Ireland changed all of theat. Michael entered the spy game because he had the perfect background for it: _wouldn't get homesick, didn't trust anyone, _and most of all _used to getting pushed around_.

Leaving her was the hardest thing he ever had to do but as a good operative he turned his back on the operation and walked away. No one would ever see the tears that would fall; she would never know how much it killed him to walk away. The fake smiles, the pretending that he was the same old Michael Westin; all of it was a façade hiding the pain he really felt.

He shifted from his spot against the wall and poked the flames with stick. As he shifted back something clattered out of his jacket and he looked at it. It laid there, the flames reflecting off its barrel. The winds seemed to slowdown and he just stared at it, he could end it right here, right now. He picked up the gun slowly as if it might explode into a million pieces in his hands. He looked it over, feeling the weight of it in his hands, feeling how much power he held and how he could change someone's life, or his own, just by pulling the trigger.

His mind flashed back to the reaction he had imagined a million times over, each time more painful than the last. Each time he would think of how torn she would have been, how many things would get blown up and worst of all how much trouble he would be in if any of her brothers caught up with him. They wouldn't care that he was a spy he knew that they would rip him limb from limb for breaking their sister's heart. He raised the gun to his head; he could end it all never again would he have to feel the pain that he felt right now.

The barrel of the gun felt cold against his head but the cold seemed to warm him knowing that he was going to end it for good relieved him. He gulped and closed his eyes thinking of his mother, his brother and _her_. His pulse began to race and he put his finger on the trigger-

_**CRASH**_

Michael jumped a mile and the gun went flying to the other side of the room. He took some slow deep breaths to calm himself.

_What are you doing? _Her voice rang out in his head _Kill yourself? That's a bit uncreative Michael; if you're going to do it might as well make it look flash. _He could feel her hands tracing the scars down his back, her cool touch made his brain whiz-

He opened his eyes and looked around for the source of the noise. His eyes rested on a small metal box that had fallen from the shelf his bag had been resting on. Some of the contents of the box had fallen out and he crawled over to pick them up. His heart stopped as he saw what they were. They were pictures that he had taken in Ireland of her. The first one was of her on the beach and she was laughing and smiling at something Michael had just said. The one beneath that was her about to cross the street in Dublin, she was looking at the camera but not at it. The look in her eyes showed she was looking at something beyond him and the camera. His heart raced as the good memories rushed into his brain. Filling him with hope that this could get fixed, he would get out of this hell hole alive.

He clutched the photos to his chest and let the tears flow freely as he rested his back against the wall of the hut. "Thanks Fi" he whispered into the winds relieved that even a year later she could still save his life whether she knew it or not.

**The inspiration for this was the fact that I think they don't show enough of Michael's dark side on the TV show so I took matters into my own hands. Please Read and Review it makes me smile every time I get a review and I get inspired to write more. **


	8. It's All Over

He kissed her.

Michael Westin kissed Fiona Glenanne like there was no tomorrow.

In that kiss he told her that it was okay.

It told her that he was alive, that he would never leave her.

He told her, in that kiss, that she didn't have to bear the weight of Claire's death anymore.

He told her it was over.

It told her he would share her pain, forever.

As the passion between them rose they both knew it wouldn't be easy.

They both knew that it would be full of fighting and almost certainly be some explosives.

The sun rose and along with it the pile of bed covers on top of Michael's bed began to stir and suddenly Fiona's head popped out from under the covers. Her eyes were red rimmed and puffy and somehow she seemed happy, some small part of her was relieved. Slowly and carefully she pulled herself off of Michael and replaced the blankets over his sleeping form before she went to the fridge and retrieved the last blueberry yoghurt.

She had managed to get most of the container before her stomach betrayed her and she rushed to his shower and emptied the contents of her stomach onto the floor. Once she started it was impossible for her to stop even thought there was nothing left. Her throat burned as she wretched over and over again as she struggled to keep her hair out of her face and stay somewhat stable on the floor. Suddenly a strong hand wrapped around her waist, supporting her, and another hand pulled her hair out of her face.

It took three full minutes for her stomach to stop trying to leap out her throat and in that time Michael hadn't left her side. Finally she took a slow, shaky breath and she collapsed into him again her body to weak to support herself anymore. Instantly Michael lifted her into his arms and walked her over to his bed where he set her down. She rolled over and closed her eyes hoping the pounding headache would suddenly disappear.

Suddenly a second weight on the bed could be felt and she opened her eyes just enough to see Michael holding a bottle of water with a straw in her direction. Carefully she reached out to grab it, using Michael as a support as she pulled herself up and took a slow sip. The cool water relieved her throat but before she could guzzle down the rest of the bottle Michael pried it from he hands.

Regretfully she sank back down into the comfort of his body and his bed allowing his aroma to relax her body and somehow she was able to fall back into the abyss of sleep.

Michael waited until he could hear Fi's breath steady out before rising from the bed and arranging the blankets around her. Quietly he walked to the fridge and seeing nothing in it but a few of Sam's beers he resided to grabbing a clean spoon and finishing Fi's yoghurt. After a few spoonfuls he set the cup down and ran his hands through his hair wincing as his bruised ribs protested the action.

"Michael" the name was halfway between a groan and a whisper but never-the-less Michael came over to the bedside immediately and looked intently at Fi's pale face "I want to blow something up."

He couldn't keep the laugh that rose in his throat down "Don't you always? You need rest." He said gently

She glared at him "If I don't blow something up…." She broke out into a fit of coughing

"Rest. I promise you can blow stuff up later." He stood up and turned to grab his keys "I have to go to the store and grab some food, I'll be back."

Fi reached out and grabbed his hand "Stay." It wasn't a command but more of a request, she wanted the single person she trusted most to stay with her. She knew that she would need him, not that she would ever tell him, but the nightmares would come and she needed him to be there.

Michael set his keys down and climbed into bed next to her, pulling her body close to his. She relaxed into his embrace and together they fell asleep. The nightmares came and went but Michael never left.

* * *

**Hey! So it's been a while since I put a story up here. I'm not really sure where this came from but enjoy and remember: **

**Read and Review **

**_AllOverTheWorld_**


	9. Broken

The moon rose higher in the Miami sky, finally signifying the end to another day in the life of Michael Westin. In one day he had: robbed a bank, lied to a friend and saved two, possibly three lives along with send a group of kidnappers (and would be murderers) to prison. Yet, while he felt good about doing all of that he knew that only one life he had saved today mattered. Fiona.

Horus later, Michael woke and for a moment he wasn't sure what had disturbed him and then he heard the noise again. Shift slightly to the right he was able to look out at his balcony where he saw the dim outline of Fi standing there. He realized she was crying.

Generally in a situation like this he would leave her alone and let her think he didn't know but something about this was different. Maybe it was the way the slight breeze made her hair blow back or how isolated she seemed on that balcony that made him slide out of bed and amble over to her.

She jumped slightly as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him, but once she realized who it was she relaxed and leaned into his chest. "Fi," he began but she cut him off.

"I was being silly, I'm fine."

Michael snorted softly "Fi, it's three thirty three am and you're standing on my balcony crying. You're not fine."

She turned around, looking into his eyes and he saw how puffy they were and realized she had been crying for quite some time now. She glared at him before turning away in silence.

"Fi" he whispered into her ear "I want to help you."

"I don't need help, I told you. I'm fine." She said sharply as she broke away from Michael's grasp and started to walk back to the bed.

Before she got very far Michael grabbed her shoulder and lightly turned her around to look at him "This isn't the first time this has happened."

He saw the waves of emotion flit across her face, shock, embarrassment, anger, shame "How many times?" she asked

"Three other times." He said quietly as if her were talking to a wild animal

She turned her gaze away from him but spoke "You know that saying 'Time heals all wounds'?" Michael nodded, confused, "It's bullshit. I thought they would go away in time. I figured I just needed time to recover but they haven't stopped."

Michael nodded but she still wouldn't look at him. She started to walk away and he didn't stop her as she continued speaking "They're mostly about-"her voice caught and she stopped for a moment trying to compose herself "about O' Neil. I keep thinking about what would have happened had you not saved me."

"You would have saved yourself." He said

She turned and looked at him, incredulous "You don't believe that, you saw how many men he had. I had no chance." She turned away again as she attempted to hide the tears that were shining in her eyes "I'm broken." She said her voice barely above a whisper

Michael shook his head even though she couldn't see it "You're not broken."

She let out a joyless laugh but he stopped her before she could start "You were shipped back to your home country and sold to the highest bidder to be tortured, you have every right have nightmares."

Her eyes flashed angrily as she turned "It's not an excuse!"

"I didn't say it was. All I'm saying is that it's normal."

She shook her head "I can't-"

"You ca, you did it today."

She turned and looked at him "Today was different."

Michael took two steps forward and put a finger under her chin lifting it to meet his gaze "It's only different because you want it to be. You allowed yourself to get kidnapped so you could save Sarah and you did that. Without you we might not have been able to rescue her without you."

"But-"

"Fiona Glenanne" Michael's voice was soft but there was a slight edge to it "You are the single most confident woman I know and I'll be damned if you let some psycho Irish radical make you think otherwise."

She looked at him before crumpling into his chest. No tears fell but she was shaking as she allowed months of pent up emotion to flow through her. For once Fiona Glenanne did not care that she was letting Michael see every emotion she was feeling. She knew that he would never judge her and that no matter what they would always have each other.

**Corny Ending? Probably. Anyway I just wanted to get something down and I think this might have been it. Please tell me what you think. **

**If you review my story I will review on of yours. **

**Sound fair? **

**Let's try!**


	10. White Knight

"_Sometimes you have to be your own white night" _

Fi had been on her own for a long time before coming to Miami and during that time she had been in plenty of scrapes and gotten herself out. She had done it so many times that it was engrained into her very being. Now, as she sat in a chair with a gun pointed at her heart. Here she was desperately trying to buy time so her make shift bomb could, ironically, save her life.

Maybe this time being your own white knight wasn't the answer and for the second time in a year she was scared. Of course she didn't let it show, she never let anything more than casual emotions show, nor did she let the pain radiating from her shoulder change her way of thinking. She was going to escape and she was going to send this slimy bastard to jail and his idiot brother. **Maybe. **

"One last drink for the road?" she asked pitifully and as Jacob bent over to get the bottle of Vodka she glanced up at the light bulb hoping that it would explode sooner rather than later.

After he untwisted the bottle and took a swig he put it to her lips and allowed some of the warm and disgusting tasting drink to slide down her throat. She took a breath and cursed inwardly at how long this was taking, hoping she could keep Jacob stalled long enough.

It's not often Fi's staring the wrong end of a gun and its even less frequent that she's pleading with a jackass so she can have an open casket wedding. Jacob complied with her 'last request' and she closed her knowing that within a few seconds she would either be dead or ducking from flying, burning, shrapnel.

Lucky for her it turned out to be the latter and she dove on top of Jacob releasing all of the anger and fear into the punches she let loose on to Jacob. She was just about to try and stall the other kidnapper when Sam came charging in sending him flying into the wall. She let out a sigh of relief and smiled when same said "Honey I'm home."

"Good, you can help take out the trash."

**Later That Night: **

The sheets rustled as Fiona rolled over, somewhere between conscious thought and the black abyss, and as she did so her hand touched Michaels. Instinctively he grabbed it and in the same motion pulled her closer to him "Michael?" she asked quietly into the darkness.

"Mmm Fi?" he asked sleepily

"Nothing." She said and rolled back over, allowing her body to curve with his, comforting her and telling her that he was there and always would be.

"Mm-kay" he said and let himself drift back asleep

Once his breathing was deep and regular she let it send her backwards into the abyss but her last thoughts revolved around the events of that day: _Maybe you don't always have to be your own white knight, but it certainly helps. _

**Hey! Nice to see that you're reading my stuff again. I'm continuing my deal from the previous chapter: **

**You review this and I'll review something you wrote, that way it's a win-win. **


	11. He, Him, Them

The sun rose over the Irish countryside revealing the dotted shapes of cows, sheep and buildings all of which were scattered across the rolling hills. In the distance the ocean sparkled, glittering like an expensive piece of jewelry but all of this natural beauty went unnoticed. The sun illuminated the tears rolling down her face like stars, shining against her pale skin.

Normally she would be embarrassed about showing so much emotion but since _he_ left nothing had mattered anymore. She didn't care that she was being emotional, nor did it matter that there had been a few close shaves with the police regarding a few, fiery explosions. Her brothers could do naught but watch as their sister went on a rampage, heart broken.

She sat on blanket _he _had given her a few days before he left; on top of the hill they had made love for the first time. As the sun rose something shone next to her, glinting in the sun light, the silver barreled gun _he_ had given her. Of course she had told her brothers she had bought when they had been in Germany but he had given it to her…

"_Fi!" he called out into the seemingly empty hotel room "Fi, you here!" _

"_Michael!" she called out in reply "I'm in the bathroom!" _

_Michael rolled his eyes as he joined her in the bathroom and saw her fixing her hair "Weren't you doing that when I left twenty minutes ago?" _

"_And?" she asked, as if asking why on earth he was confused as to why it was taking so long for her to fix her hair "Where I you go anyway, it's not like we need anything." She said with a playful grin on her face. _

"_I got something for you." He said quietly_

_She turned to face him with an interested sparkle in her eye "what is it?" _

_He reached around a grabbed the item he had tucked away in his waistband after he had purchased from on of his contacts, and set it on the counter. Michael watched as her eyes lit up and she reached out to touch it as if it was a wild animal "It's gorgeous." She whispered and as her lips brushed his she murmured "Thank you." _

Wiping the tears from her face she took a few deep breaths attempting to compose herself "He never cared. He's trained to drop everything and forget in thirty minutes or less. You should never have gotten so connected to him." She whispered to herself, it had been weeks of this type of talk that had driven her to this moment.

She stood up and looked down at the sparkling waters below her and raised her arm, ready to let go of the last thing she had that connected her to _him_, the gun. She threw but didn't let go, she couldn't let go. Her eyes sparkled as she looked down at the item she held in her hand, every memory of the past three months rushing through her.

She would move on. It would take time but it would happen. Whatever happened she knew that she would hate him but she would also never forget _him_.


	12. So Close

She had prepared herself for this moment.

She had known it was coming and yet she was scared.

She had prepared herself for Michael's bullet ridden body.

She had even prepared herself for Sam's death but her own, no, that wasn't something she was ready for.

So, here she stood with a gun pointed at her face and for the first time in her life she really, truly thought this was the end. Fiona knew there was no bargaining with Jesse, he had blood on his mind and as he stood here she could see in his eyes that he was going to make them pay. He knew that the way to make that happen was her; she was Michael's weak spot.

She pleaded and told him that he meant something to her but he was beyond the point of reason. She was going to die here, in Michael's apartment. Very briefly she pictured how Michael would take seeing her dead on his floor. She quickly concluded not well.

As the tears rose to her eyes she did nothing to stop them. She closed here eyes and took a deep, calming breath. She thought about her parents and her brothers, they would hunt Jesse down and kill him slowly for this. Next her thoughts flashed to Claire.

Fiona had never been particularly religious but now, on the brink of death, she hoped that she would get to see Claire. She hoped she would be able to see Claire and tell her how sorry she was. Lastly, but not surprisingly, came Michael. They had shared so much together, love, anger, hate, fear, and so many more indescribable emotions. He had shot down his way back into his old life for her and that meant something. Sometimes it was the only thing that gave her hope that he would give up this crazy search.

"Goody-bye Fiona."

She gulped, this was it, and this is the moment she was going to die. Fiona braced herself but nothing happened and as she heard the door to Michael's loft open she opened her eyes. He was gone. Letting out a breath she hadn't even known she was holding she dialed Michael's number.

She was barely keeping herself together as he answered. As quickly and as calmly as she could she told him what had happened and even as she spoke she heard him leaving the table at Carlito's and getting in his car. They never hung up that entire time and even after they had long lapsed into silence just the sound of Michael's breathing calmed her down.

By the time he walked in the door the tears were rolling down her face. He didn't set his gun down but he wrapped her in his arms. The relief of being with him lasted maybe a minute before she turned on him, ripping herself out of his arms "I told you." She said her voice steadily rising "I told you that this would happen!"

"Fi-" he began but she swung a punch at him and he ducked and stepped back wildly trying to avoid the onslaught of punches coming his way. Suddenly he grabbed her arms and using a maneuver she was familiar with twisted her arms around her back "Don't fight me, just listen, please. Fi, I sorry I dragged you into this. I'm sorry that you almost died tonight and it was all my fault." Little did Fiona know that from the moment she had said the words _'Jesse found out everything.'_ His heart had practically beat its way out of his rib cage. It was, quite literally, his worst fear: Fiona's death being entirely his fault.

Fiona looked at him and unknown to Michael she knew what his worst fear was. It was something she had picked up on years ago and to this day she had never told him. However this was not the time for her to tell that to him, she was still angry that she had almost died and besides angry they now had Jesse to worry about "You know he's going to want you dead." She asked as he released her arms .

"Yes." He said

"Well, while I may not be the biggest fan of what happened throughout this entire situation I promised to stick by you. I'm not going to let him kill you, only I'm allowed to do that." She said and he knew that she meant it.

"Thanks Fi." He said and she turned away from him.

"Better get Same over here, we now have a crazy burned spy after us. We are going to need all the help we can get on this one."

**Umm..so…Who else loved that episode? I DID! I was in love with it and I know that my fic will be only one of many to come based on those last minutes. I can not wait for the season finale and I hope that you enjoyed this. WAIT! I have an idea…why don't you tell me if you liked it or not. **

**REVIEW! **

**Also I'm working on a new, much longer, fic! It is Burn Notice related, wish me luck!**


End file.
